Gone is the Month of February...

Notice, I did this last month too...life is traveling way too fast and before I know it, a whole month has gone by without me blogging! So, a synopsis of my February...

Snow, snow, snow. Really, it's pretty, BUT I am so over it. I think I may cry if it snows again before spring, and that is highly likely living here in northern Indiana. I am super pumped for warmth!

My summer plans have been solidified! I will be working through the hospital up here at school and doing in-home cardiac rehab for the elderly. Yes, I am just a tad bit excited :)

I turned 21...another year older which means one year closer to "becoming a responsible adult" - scary to say the least, but exciting all the same.

Spring break is in session as I type. No, I did not go anywhere warm, but that's fine with me...a week with family, no schoolwork, and sleeping in is all I need!

And, last but certainly not least, the countdown til summer has officially started: 8 weeks!

Gone is the Month of January...

so it is DEFINITELY time for another post; it has nearly been a month since my last post! There are so many things I want to write about, so please be patient with me as I ramble through such a random post.

First, I am SO anxious for summer! Actually, spring would be fine with me. I am tired of cold and snow. I was grateful for the snow last week as seeing the "blizzard" gave us a snow day, but now spring can be here. I am ready to enjoy the outside. To walk leisurely to class. To step outside for fresh air. To relax outside and do nothing. For the sun to shine. For the grass to be green. For new leaves on the trees. And for all the little creatures that live on campus to show themselves again. To put away winter clothes and break out the flip flops. I am definitely a sucker for warm weather!

Second, I am SHOCKED by how fast this semester is going by! I am also pleasantly surprised by how easy my classes are (fingers crossed!) Last semester was my hardest one yet, so I am definitely enjoying a less stressful, more enjoyable semester filled with classes that I love. When thinking about the rest of the semester, I only have 3 more months left of the school year! Then...hello summer followed by my last semester of college!

Third, speaking of last semester of college...the reality of that freaks me out a little. By this time next year, I will be forced to be a grown up. What does that all entail even?! I don't know, but what I do know is that I need to learn the logistics of what being a grown up is or else life may be a little scary for a while.

Fourth, becoming a grown up means getting a "real" job. Finally...making money instead of dumping your bank account into education. I am SO excited for this new chapter in life. I actually have an interview tomorrow for a possible summer job that may lead me to advance in the medical field once I graduate. I am super excited and extremely nervous; I am excited about all the opportunities God has in store for me, yet, being interrogated by doctors and possible future employers is in no way fun. However, I have prepared as much as I can and I am relying fully on God to guide me through this; His will is perfect, so we'll see what happens!

Fifth, it is so exciting to see God working in several areas that are tangent to my life. I find myself quite possibly the closest to my Lord than I have ever been and it has been enjoyable to say the least. An unexplainable joy consumes me and I love it! I am growing and learning so much which is very encouraging.

Well, that's all the rambling I have in me for now. Hopefully, a whole month will not fly by until I write again!

Snow Hater

PICK ME!

I am one you would call a snow hater. Sure, give me a white Christmas - start snowing at midnight on Christmas Eve and then be gone the day after Christmas...but that is it!

Being up in northern Indiana, we get lots of lake effect snow...too much sometimes. For example, this weekend we got 34 inches. Yep, you heard me...34 INCHES!!! And wait, there's more, an expected 8-10 inches by Wednesday.

I guess I better start loving the idea of snow...

Laughing at Myself After a Freak Out

You know those times when it feels like NOTHING is working out how it's supposed to?? I mean, you try SO hard to make everything run smoothly, but it is just totally out of your control?
Yes, that is how it has been while trying to set up my clinical rotations for school. I had in mind clearly what I wanted to do and what I needed to do in order to set it all up. Email after email, phone call after phone call, I was getting no where. I felt so lost, I didn't know who to contact for help or even advice. I was almost at the point of giving up.
Then, out of nowhere, some clinical instructor that I had never heard of emailed me out of the blue, spelling out clearly in her email what I needed and telling me that she had set everything up for me already! PRAISE JESUS!
That was an email full of relief! Then, after the rush of excitement, I just sat there and laughed at myself. Of course I would freak out when I'm trying to do everything on my own, after all, God is the one who is in control :)

New Years Resolution

Everybody makes them, and very seldom keep them. I usually don't make any New Years Resolutions because I know I am not disciplined enough to keep them. But this year I am...only one:

GROW UP.

Yep, that is my ONE New Years Resolution. If I truly face the facts, I am scared to become an adult. So, this year is going to be a year of practicing. I really don't know what that looks like, but I guess I will find out!

I need to be smart and realistic about my future. Not just think about what would be nice, but what would be the most realistic and, most importantly, where God wants me to be.

I need to realize that I am not invincible. I sometimes think that...and am soon reminded by an unfortunate series of events that I am only human. I need rest and cannot do everything. I need to practice saying "no" more often and not burning myself out. I need to prioritize my schedule wisely.

I need to think about others more and not just myself. Whether I like it or not, my decisions also affect others. I need to be aware of their feelings and needs and not just my own.

I also need to grow and mature in my relationship with Christ. Without spiritual growth, I should not expect quality growth in any other aspect of my life.

I need to ask questions. About ANYTHING. Anything that I am unsure about, it doesn't hurt to ask. After all, I may learn something from someone else...a shocker I know :)

So, here goes 2011!

Uncertainty

Is my worst enemy.

I struggle with it day in, day out. Which is kind of pathetic. Cause what am I going to do about it by worrying about it? NOTHING. That's the thing...it's called uncertainty - not knowing my future. Sounds scary. However, it shouldn't. Why? Cause to God, there is no such thing as uncertainty. And that's all that matters. For God's plans are better than my plans. He knows my WHOLE life and it will ALL turn out for good. So what should I do? Stop worrying!

I love planning, I love thinking about my future, I love dreaming, and most of the time I am up for a little spontaneity. However, if this makes sense, I hate change. Why? Cause it's different, it's something I'm not used to, it's uncomfortable. For as long as I can remember, I regularly find myself thinking, "This time next year I will be..." and it is easy for me to come up with a general idea of what that looks like. However, I was thinking this the other day and I scared myself...I couldn't come up with an answer! The only thing I could think of was that I would be done with college. Yes, only one more year of college! I never thought the end would be in sight. But now it is...in the distant future, but it is very real. And even though it is exciting, it is UNCERTAIN. Cause who knows what I will be doing this time next year? I like to think that I have a general idea. But when I look at it, that is all MY plans and not God's. What does God have in store? Well, He's not telling me that yet. But that's okay, because I have a whole year. And I do know, that whatever it is, it is good. :)

Crazy Wednesday/Thursday

You know you have a crazy day when you can't take 5 minutes to sit and write about it! Hence the reason today's post is covering both yesterday and today :)

What I accomplished yesterday: Chemistry test (LAST ONE!), LAST Logic lecture, Probability and Statistics project

Today: sleep in :) (a little), Sports in Society homework, Probability and Statistics presentation, LAST Probability and Statistics class, Logic take-home final

Comforting focus of the day: God is my strength in weakness! Whenever I feel at the end of my rope, He always supplies me with strength to persevere. He encourages me through others as well.

EMBRACE THE DAY!

Crazy Tuesday

Today - Sports in Society homework, Chemistry lab presentation, studying for Chemistry test...all day!

Comforting focus of the day - God wants us to be joyful...today is just ONE day. If it doesn't go as planned, it is not the end of the world. I need to make the most of today and be glad in it.

EMBRACE THE DAY!

Crazy Monday

This week is the week right before final exams, aka - CRAZY WEEK! There is no other way to go about this week than to just take it one day at a time. So, that is how my blog posts are going to go this week...one day at a time.

Today - 3 classes, work on Probability and Statistics project, work on Chemistry lab presentation.

Comforting focus of the day - I am so thankful that God is in control and not me! His plan is PERFECT. If I abide in Him, then He will take care of me by giving me the strength, patience, endurance, focus and organization to complete everything that I need to.

EMBRACE THE DAY!

Simple Memories

I LOVE CHRISTMASTIME! Something about this time each year just makes everyone more joyful in general. The world is more cheery, carefree, and just uplifting. It is the time of family traditions, which I am a big sucker for. I mean, if we don't do the SAME EXACT thing each year, it throws me for a loop...so tradition is good :)

Today my family is doing what we always do the Saturday after Thanksgiving...hunting for our Christmas tree! This is always quite the adventure for the Grass family. No, we have down finding the perfect tree, it's getting it to stand up at home that we struggle with.

You see, there were about 3 consecutive years where we would find the perfect tree at the tree farm, but once we got home, we noticed that the trunk was crooked...WAY crooked. Our solution? Put nails into the wall, tie strings to the trunk of the tree, and pray it stays standing once we tie the strings to the nails. Usually it works, but it takes quite the skill.

Before we would leave the house, we would pray that when we returned, the tree would still be standing...but that only happened about fifty percent of the time. It got quite humorous actually...besides the fact that our floor would end up soaking wet, a few presents got soggy, and a couple of ornaments broke in the process.

One time our tree fell over and we were actually home. My sister and I were in the kitchen and my dad was sleeping in the recliner right next to the tree. The tree never fell over while we were at home. Whenever we first noticed the tree was leaning, we would immediately fix it so it wouldn't fall over. Well, all of a sudden my sister and I heard the tree fall over...right on top of dad! It was quite the sight.

Needless to say, we ALWAYS check the trunk of the tree before it is dubbed 'perfect tree'.

Just for Fun

So, I got distracted while researching for my papers and found these...

-Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

-I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

-We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

-The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.

-Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

-If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.

-We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

-War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

-Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

-Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.

-Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.

-Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

-To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

-How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

-A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.

-Some people are like Slinkies ... not really good for anything, but you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.

-Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". What's my mother going to do?

-I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

-The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

-Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

-The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

-Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

-Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?

-Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.

-My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.

-I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.

-To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

-A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist.

-A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.

-If winning isn't everything why do they keep score?

-A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.

:)

When I Become Rich (and Lazy)

I will hire someone to wash my hair.

I went to get my haircut yesterday. My favorite part?? When my hairdresser scrubs and scrubs and scrubs my head. It's so relaxing and feels so awesome. It was definitely a treat after washing my hair with hard water in the lovely dorm showers for 5 weeks!

Note to Self

When your blinds are open,
your window is open,
your music is blaring,
and you are perfectly visible to the outside world....


do NOT sing and dance like a fool

Sophisticated Nerd

I have been called 'Nerd' about 5 times in the last week...it's pretty sad, but when I think about it:

I find myself randomly going through the muscles and bones of the body without even thinking,

I love all those medical documentaries on mysterious medical conditions...they're like puzzles. And then I get SUPER excited when I figure it out.

I love it when people are sick and I "pre-diagnose" them and then they go to the doctor to find out they have what I thought they had [well, I don't like the fact that they were sick, just the fact that I was right :)]

Whenever I bend my arm or leg I find myself thinking "flexion, extension, abduction, adduction, prone, supine, etc"

I love dissecting!

The smell of a sterile hospital may or may not be one of my favorite smells,

I LOVE working with the cadaver!

Scrubs are quite possibly my favorite outfit,

I long for the day when wearing my stethoscope around my neck is part of my uniform,

Getting new medical textbooks in the mail feels like Christmas,

so basically...yes, I may be nerdy, but a "normal" one at that :)

Forgetting to Breathe

I am barely treading above water. It comes in stages: first you start out by telling yourself that you are going to attack this week with calmness and avoid getting overwhelmed, then you sense the stressfulness starting to rise but you are strong enough to succumb it, then it just keeps coming back so you accept it as a fact of life, then you are really stressing and tell yourself that next week will be better, then you eventually become numb to the feeling and it's a part of your life, and then it gets so bad you forget to breathe.

It's the unending cycle of a college student like me...unfortunately.

Sometimes [actually a lot of times] I find myself running myself ragged with no purpose trying to conquer the world. Obviously I fail every time. I take on everyone's problems as my own and think it is my duty to fix their lives. Yes, I have an obligation to come alongside others and encourage them, but I do not have control over their lives. Neither do they...only God does. And I need to wake up every morning with that in my head - God is the only one in control.

So, I can stop worrying about how I am going to accomplish this or that, worrying about if this or that person will get through the week, cause I can do nothing...life happens and that's when relying on God is vital.

I need to not approach each week simply not caring what will come my way, cause we all know that will never happen! Instead, I need to enter each week with open hands, giving God complete control and being at peace with that.

So my goal for the next week -- stop, thank God for caring about my life even more than I do, breathe, and go on.

Ohhh Chemistry...

Sometimes, it is really hard to have a good attitude. For me, I have to start to mentally prepare for Chemistry class the night before; bad I know. We took a test last week (which I studied for 10 hours for) and I felt illiterate when I was taking it. We got those tests back today and I have been preparing myself all weekend for the disgusting grade I would find on my test. Surprisingly I got a C...which I have never been so happy to get a C in my life.

We were going through test questions and I looked at one that was worth 12 points, and how many points did I receive for that question?? 1...yes, 1. It wasn't that I had no clue what I was doing, I just switched two numbers around. I did the whole problem correctly, but because I swapped those two numbers I obviously got the wrong answer. Now, I definitely was expecting to get some points taken off; after all, I got the wrong answer. But minus 11 points?! I clearly showed that I knew how to work the problem, so maybe give me half?? Nope, not happening.

And then, pretty much the whole class had a question on a multiple choice problem. We all got the answer of .5 when really it was supposed to be 2. So, he told us to work it out again....we still got .5. He told us we must have made a mathematical error and told us to try again. Sure enough...still .5. He didn't even work out the problem and still came to the conclusion that we ALL made a mathematical error...a little sketchy. So, that question still has a big X marked through it.

Oh well, I get all worked up about 1 little class in 1 little semester, but it is SO frustrating. But, I guess it is something that teaches me patience, perseverance, and humility...all three which I need to work on apparently. So, after this semester, hopefully I will see growth in these areas. In the mean time, this class has given me an idea for what type of discipline to use with my kids in the future. Instead of time outs or spankings, I'm just gonna pull out my big, fat Chemistry book and make them work through it...

Thankful for the Little Things

Today I REALLY didn't wanna go to my Chemistry lab. Now, don't get me wrong, it is not like I love going to Chemistry lab each week, but today was just one of those days...I didn't wanna go at all. I got dominated by a Chem test yesterday and I just wanted to have a day where I felt like I actually understood my academics...this would mean a day without any Chemistry.

I kept thinking to myself, "This day would be FANTASTIC if lab was canceled, but why would my prof cancel lab?? There is no good reason, and we only have lab once a week, so there is no way it is going to be canceled".

Guess what...it got canceled!

Therefore, today is a FANTASTIC day :)

Sweet Tea Triggers

Today I just realized how much I am addicted to McDonald's sweet tea. For one, whenever my mom sends me McDonald's Dollars in the mail, it feels like Christmas. Second, the McDonald's employees who are always working when I visit (Theresa and Ben) know me by name...and my order. In fact, if one of them is working the headset, I just have to tell them that it's me and they'll have my order ready for me at the window...right every time.

Certain things in my daily routine trigger the need for a sweet tea run:
-Chemistry...anything to do with that class
-Logic homework
-New Testament papers
-a stressful day at work
-not being able to start homework until 10 pm

so, basically, these sweet tea runs are a regular occurrence.

I Would Never...Oh, I Just Did...

It's easy to stereotype college students...what they do, what they don't do, how much they procrastinate, how crazy they are, etc. Before entering college there were certain things that I had heard of that describe college students and I told my self I would never do...well, I may or may not have done some of those things. Like:

-thinking anything before 10 is way too early
-the main way to cook any type of food is using the microwave...if cooking it at all
-instead of falling asleep in class, you just stay in bed and sleep
-you can't even remember the last time you washed your car
-your underwear and sock supply dictates your laundry schedule
-you wash dishes in the bathroom sink...when it's absolutely necessary to wash them
-finding random people in your house is perfectly normal...you will even talk to them like you've known them for years.
-the standard of meals per day falls to 2...if you're lucky
-your trash is overflowing, but your bank account is definitely not
-going to WalMart is a highlight of your week
-you wear the same jeans until you can't remember the last time you washed them
-breakfast is always on the go...if it exists that is
-quarters are like gold
-procrastination is your middle name
-you talk to your roommate on facebook chat...when you guys are in the same room
-you see people you've met several times and still cannot remember their names
-last names don't exist...if you're lucky you'll get the person's first name and their major
-you pay $100 for a book that you read maybe once and return it at the end of the semester for $7
-when the dining commons food is unidentifiable, cereal is always a safe alternative
-you throw things away because you don't feel like washing them
-going to the library is a social event
-you wear flip flops in the shower...for safety precautions
-Visits home depend on how much money you have for gas
-you skip one class to write a paper for another
-Bicycles aren't as lame as they were in high school
-your balance improves drastically...just try shaving in the showers in the dorm
-you've stopped to put $5 worth of gas in your car
-going to the mailbox becomes an ego booster/breaker...take your pick
-packages rank right up there with birthdays
-printers only break down when you desperately need them
-your computer and planner become your brain
-a canceled class is almost as exciting as Christmas
-taking a nap in the library is completely normal
-Christmas lights are acceptable all year round
-you are no longer thankful that fire alarms are here to protect you
-there's always a "question "kid in atleast one of your classes...this is where you get to practice patience
-laundry is an all day event
-you actually start using coupons
-you run out of black ink, and instead of buying a new cartridge, you decide blue is a nice substitute...adds a bit of flair

yep, I most definitely fit into this stereotype...

10 Great TV Role Models for Kids

This was an article title on the MSN news page this morning, and really, I was quite disturbed...

1) Clinton Kelly and Stacy London: tell contestants time and time again that they need to love themselves, love their bodies as they are, and find ways to dress and groom themselves in a way that helps them feel good and succeed in the world.

2) Lisa Simpson: remains passionate, idealistic and sweet despite her circumstances.

3) Mercedes from Glee: beauty doesn't always come in a stick-thin body. She uses her talent to tell the world what she believes.

4) Alexis from Castle: a happy teen who loves her dad. Rather study over the weekend than spend time with her friends - responsible.

5) Tim Gunn: wisest man on television - "make it work" is his famous quote.

6) Jon Stewart: reminds us that extremism evokes fear and bitterness.

7) Adam Savage and Jamie Hyneman from Mythbusters: geeky and curious. Relentlessly creative in pursuit of elusive truths. They make learning entertaining.

8) Ellen Degeneres: gives hope to teens who are struggling with their sexual identity.

9) Veronica Mars: smart, fearless, witty, and disciplined. Can tell her parents anything and never fell into peer pressure.

10) Jamie Oliver: taught others how to improve their health through home cooking. He is proof that you can take your passion and make something great of yourself. Anyone can make a difference.

Not bashing on any of these people, do you see why I am so disturbed? I mean, some have pretty good "qualities", but I would not want any of these "top 10" to be my child's role model. Our culture does not need anyone else telling us to love ourselves more, we are already too good at that. The Simpsons...really? First, it is a cartoon, and second, I would never let my kids watch that show, let alone try to make one of the characters my child's role model. Yes, I believe that gender identity is a real problem in today's society, but Ellen Degeneres is not the person we need to be getting our advice from on such an issue.

God calls us to be role models. We need to be stronger than these role models that society is trying to push for. What are we doing today that encourages others to live for Christ?