Forgetting to Breathe

I am barely treading above water. It comes in stages: first you start out by telling yourself that you are going to attack this week with calmness and avoid getting overwhelmed, then you sense the stressfulness starting to rise but you are strong enough to succumb it, then it just keeps coming back so you accept it as a fact of life, then you are really stressing and tell yourself that next week will be better, then you eventually become numb to the feeling and it's a part of your life, and then it gets so bad you forget to breathe.

It's the unending cycle of a college student like me...unfortunately.

Sometimes [actually a lot of times] I find myself running myself ragged with no purpose trying to conquer the world. Obviously I fail every time. I take on everyone's problems as my own and think it is my duty to fix their lives. Yes, I have an obligation to come alongside others and encourage them, but I do not have control over their lives. Neither do they...only God does. And I need to wake up every morning with that in my head - God is the only one in control.

So, I can stop worrying about how I am going to accomplish this or that, worrying about if this or that person will get through the week, cause I can do nothing...life happens and that's when relying on God is vital.

I need to not approach each week simply not caring what will come my way, cause we all know that will never happen! Instead, I need to enter each week with open hands, giving God complete control and being at peace with that.

So my goal for the next week -- stop, thank God for caring about my life even more than I do, breathe, and go on.